


I Wanna Go

by starrjiarr



Category: GOT7
Genre: Alternate Universe, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, End of High School, Living up to expectations, oneshot(?)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2017-07-10
Packaged: 2018-11-30 03:56:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11455470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrjiarr/pseuds/starrjiarr
Summary: What do you do when everyone around you wants you to be perfect all the time?Rebel.





	I Wanna Go

**Author's Note:**

> This is about living up to expectations fwi   
> Basically Mark, Jaebum and Jackson where like perfect they got great grades and where obedient but one day Mark and Jaebum decided they're done with all the pressure and wild out. They party drink(no smoking to they like they're lungs) and basically are done with the stress while Jackson misses China and is feeling like his life his falling apart. All these events and emotions lead to this conversation one late night.  
> (This was written on a phone so sorry if formations weird?)

  _The Honor Roll Boys._

_Marks P.O.V_

 

 

It was dead silence. The type of silence that happens right after chaos happens and your processing everything that's happened.

Maybe that's what we were doing. Maybe we were processing what just happened in these few last months of high school. How Jaebum and I went from every parents dream to every parents worst nightmare. How Jackson went from most popular boy in school to crying in the bathroom stalls during lunch.

Jackson sat with his knees to his chest on the grass with his baseball cap covering almost all of his face. He wore a black tank top and basketball shorts. His whole outfit was black, most likely chosen by his subconscious symbolsing his emotional state. His duffle bag was thrown next to him. He had been on his way home from the gym before this meeting started.

Jaebum wore torn up jeans, a leather jacket, a shirt he probably stole from Yugyeom and an old pair of all black converse he cherished and wore everyday. Why they hadn't fallen of his feet from years or wear and tear beats me. He leaned on his hands with his legs spread looking at the grown. His freshly colored red hair already fading from him being so inexperienced with hair color. He looked as if he was contemplating so much.

I wore a plain black hoodie, torn up jeans and a pair of white Nikes to match my too-big tank top.

We all wore some type of black these days.

i looked around at where we were and the both of them. The setting was chilling. Three dead silent teenage boys in a circle with tension you could cut with a knife.

The tension handnt been from us it had been from what the subject of us all being here was.

Jaebum spoke first.

"What're we doing, Mark?"

I stayed silent and looked at the ground.

I hadn't know anymore. At first it was too lash out, now, it was too numb the pain.

"Yeah," Jackson spoke up,"what are you two doing?"

"Jackson c'mon-"

"No." Jackson cut him off.

"You guys haven't done anything to help yourselves." His voice started to shake. "You guys haven't done anything to help me..." Now he was crying. I knew Jaebums heart was as broken as mine now.

"Jacks..." he started again. "We didn't mean to leave you behind we just-"

"Just what? Didn't like the buzz-kill hangin' around? You guys were like me too! You guys knew I was just as sad as you!"

We had. And we didn't try to include him. That was a mistake.

"We didn't think you'd want to-"

"Go party? Go get laid? Drink? Hell yeah I would have, I wanted to let go to, I wanted to forget about school and sports and my parents potential disappointment looming over my head!" He kept cutting Jaebum off at this point but he was right. Jackson hated the idea of his parents being disappointed in him. They had worked to hard to have a son who didn't follow all of their expectations. His older brother did as he was told and had no qualms about it. Jackson? Jackson got sent to South Korea and ended up just being even more miserable. Not that his parents ever knew. No, no. Jackson wouldn't allow for his parents to know how much they're bourchure of colleges and fencing scholarship applications actually hurt him.

Jaebum and Jackson had the same dream. Music. They only difference is that Jaebum wasn't going to let himself be suffocated anymore, he was going to become a singer while Jackson was willing to drown.

Not because he was a coward or because he didn't have confidence, he just wasn't going to hurt his parents even though he might hurt himself.

"I don't want to be here anymore." I said, barley above a whisper.

"Me neither." Jackson whispered.

"Same here." Jaebum croaked. He was chocking up. So was I.

We giggled at our sniffles and how we all had to wipe away some sort of tear. We needed a laugh even if it was small.

"I'm sorry we didn't help you more." Jaebum stated he was now sitting a little slumped with his hands in his spread lap.

"Yeah, me too. I'm sorry." I added.

"It's okay. I get" he answered.

"We need to stop this." Jaebum finally said something again.

"Hm?" I hummed.

"This. We need to stop fucking sitting here and dealing with our emotions by ourselves and lasting out. We need to go away from here."

He was right. None of us wanted to be here anymore. This small town full of judging eyes was too much. I wanted to go back to America, I wanted to see the states, drive all night and sleep all day. I wanted to go somewhere where being  quiet wasn't so bad. Jaebum just wanted out. Jackson wanted to go back to his family and tell them how he really felt.

"Everyone expects so much from us...what if u don't want to do things they look forward too.." Jackson said voice low.

"I just wanted to finally do something different with my life." I said. This  startled Jaebum and Jackson since I was always so quiet, their face did rest though after a few seconds.

 "If I could I'd go back in time to middle school and tell my parents I wanted to do music so the expectations wouldn't be so high so I could just do what  **I** wanted without all of the horrible feelings." Jaebum rarely opened up but when he did he always said something you could relate to.

"I look at flights to Hong Kong a lot." The athlete admitted. "I look at them and know that if I could I could get one. My mom said she'd let me go back whenever I asked. I never ask her though."

"I look at pictures of my sisters and brother back in the states and get sad." I  missed home to.

"I want to go to Australia." The leather clad Jaebum suddenly said.

"Why Australia?" Jackson asked.

"I don't know." Jaebum smiled. "I just, want to go."

Jackson looked at him and smiled, "You should go."

"You should go too China. And Mark should go to America." They looked at me when he said my name.

We made a deal then. We all go where we wanted we all follow our hearts. It sounds cheesy, as if we're in some kid adventure movie but for us it was our knew will to keep going. High School was over. We didn't have to worry about grades unless we went to college. So that  was a new path that we made for ourselves that we wouldn't and couldn't go back on.

The patch of grass we then sat on became deserted, only left with the faint imprint of our bodies.

We never saw eachother again.

Jaebum ran home smiling as he realized what he was doing.

Jackson looked at Jaebums running back and my face and gave one last hyena laugh before he turned and started walking. As he walked down the sidewalk he pulled out his phone pressed some buttons and began speaking in Chinese.

I lingered there looking at they're back as a tear fell I was so happy for them. For  _us._

I then began walking to the bus station. I smiled at the feeling, the feeling of all that weight on your shoulders gone. The feeling of not having to worry about what people think anymore gone. It was pure bliss. As I sat on the bus I wondered what would be become of Jaebum. What would become of Jackson? What would be become of me? All I knew in that moment was that life wasn't meant to be for other people's visions, life was meant for your dreams.

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Tell me what u think! Oh and some people really liked my genderqueer GOT7 stuff so I'll do more and maybe even BTS :)


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